A Few Things.

So yeah, we got married and moved to Georgia. Let’s actually see some stuff.

wedding1. We got married. Like I said before, bargain rack dress, already owned suit, lots of candles, and plenty of champagne. For all the sappy stuff and more specifics about the beautiful day go read the previous post. Loved it, love him, love you guys.

2. We moved to Georgia. Toby got a job offer down here in Georgia and took it! We found a really great place that is pretty close to where Toby works and it is affordable and amazing. I don’t quite feel comfortable putting up a picture of WHERE we live but I’ll show you the view.

This was my first morning in Georgia with my new husband. It really made me feel like I was making the right decision and that I could definitely do this.

That back porch view ain't nothing to sneeze at.

Yeah, the sunrise is something else here.

3. Leaving home meant leaving my job. No I haven’t found a permanent job down here yet and that’s ok. I temped where Toby works for a few weeks and just know that the school has been around since 1969 and the original building burned down a few years ago. It left a burning of what was painted on the walls and it’s awesome.


So there’s all that. Now let’s move on to a few things I’ve learned. I’ve been married for about 2 months now and that makes me pretty much and expert right?

  • Kroger has an app (I already knew about this but still) and you can load coupons directly onto your card. Also with the app, if you forget your actual Kroger card like I do, there is a screen you can access that serves as your card. They scan it and the coupons are automatically applied to your checkout. It’s pretty freakin’ sweet.
  • Couponing is a skill yet to be mastered. I’ve given it a try and saved a few dollars with it but it’s a goal to get the store to pay me to take a product. That’s the American dream, right?
  • Crockpots are a gift from heaven. My mom gave us a Crockpot as a wedding gift and we use it probably once a week. IT CAN JUST DO SO MANY THINGS!! It is also exceptionally easy to clean. I LOVE it. LOOOOVE it.
  • My husband can cook. I knew he could cook breakfast food, he’s a pro at some fried egg sandwiches, but he can throw down some skill in the kitchen.

Do you see? Man can make some food. Tasty, tasty food.

  • Things are expensive. I knew that generally things were expensive but good lord, knock it off people. We needed a soap dispenser and the cheapest one at the store was $2. Now, $2 is not bad but this thing was UGLY. I’m not about to pay any amount of dollars for something that I don’t like. The cost of things has led me to become even more interested in making things myself. This leads me to my next point.
  • A Softsoap dispensing pump fits perfectly onto a Crown Royal bottle. Also, the label of the Crown Royal bottle comes off just fine with water. Toby’s dad gave us a bottle of delicious Regal Apple Crown Royal for our wedding and when we had emptied it I decided it would be good for soap.
  • Shampoo is something you just have to buy and shop for value. In the shower one day I think to myself, “Ya know, I would really love not to waste so many plastic bottles with shampoo and conditioner. I bet I can make my own and put it in a glass bottle. I’m an Earth Saver.” So naturally, I went to Pinterest and got to searching. I found a recipe that I liked. It called for Castille Soap (beautiful thing, look it up), olive oil, and honey. I put it in an old stir fry sauce bottle and got to bathing. I will say that yes, it did clean my hair. It achieved the desired goal. BUT I felt that I still needed to use conditioner because my hair was painfully tangled after I towel dried it. It did smell good, I used orange Castille soap so I kind of smelled like a baked orange roll. In a good way. So, because I wasn’t doing anything particularly dirtying I didn’t wash my hair until 2 days later. This is where we learned that it was a bad idea. I open that bottle and THE NASTIEST DAMN SMELL CAME OUT AND PUNCHED ME IN THE FACE. I didn’t think olive oil or honey could be combined with anything and smell so NASTY but I managed it. Also it separated in the bottle and both layers are this scary brown/orange color and I’m afraid to touch it.

See? Nasty.

  • Scotch clear adhesive squares are pure garbage. Just don’t waste your time on them. Pure garbage. They don’t even hold up paper. They are deceivingly sticky when you are applying them to whatever it is you’re trying to hang up but once it’s on the wall you have 15 minutes to an hour to appreciate your work and then you get to watch it crash to the ground. Or if you’re as lucky as we were, it will come crashing down in the middle of the night and you’ll get to see how good your imagination is at coming up with things that could be happening in the living room at 1 in the morning.
  • Never judge that one family member that has photos all over their fridge and house. Moving just over 6 hours away from family can really make you miss them and it’s pretty obnoxious to go to Facebook or your phone every time you miss their face. Our fridge is plastered with family members pictures and we have photos on the walls and in frames placed throughout the home so that no matter where you sit you won’t feel lonely. It really helps on those hard days to be able to look up and see some cute faces.

To be fair, one of these is an otter with a magnet on it. We still like it though.

We are enjoying ourselves so far, don’t worry about us one bit. We’ll be sure to keep you all updated when we feel like it.


So We Got Married.

If someone had asked me a year ago what I thought I would be doing in March of 2015 my answer would have been so far from what ended up happening. Like, laughably wrong. If a year ago someone said, “Hey Rebekah, this time next year you’re already going to be married, living in southeastern Georgia, and be a lot more into DIY crafting than the average human,” I would have questioned their sanity. BUT here we are. Married, in southeastern Georgia and getting judged for making and trying my own homemade shampoo. Shall we?

So the last blog post I made was in May of last year where I was talking about wedding planning and dress buying for a wedding that was supposed to happen in May of THIS year. Obviously that did not go as planned. Instead of having a medium-sized wedding in an expensive, beautiful gown with my bridesmaids beside me in the church I’ve gone to my whole life we had something way cooler. We got to get married on New Years Eve, I was wearing a black, clearance rack dress, and we were in the foyer of one of our best friends homes. I am so glad it happened that way.  Because of a job offer that Toby got at the beginning of December 2014 we decided to go ahead and get married and move down for him to take the job. We hadn’t bought any of the costumes for the big wedding so throwing a wedding together in 2 weeks was only mildly super hard.

We were legally married on New Years Eve around 9 in the morning by the county clerk in Lebanon, TN. Romantic right? Our plan had been to get a friend to officiate but because of our county’s specific laws his officiant background was not up to par. WHATEVA. So we did a courthouse wedding and decided to have the ceremony part in the friend’s house. Because of the size and time restraints we didn’t want anyone to rush to find a dress or suit and spend extra money after the holidays so we stood up there with only the “Officiant”. He was in his military uniform and we looked hella fresh so don’t fret. We had a beautiful little ceremony where we read our vows that we’d written and then like 5 minutes later we went and drank champagne and had cake and it was delicious.

Time for shoutouts? I think so! First- The Rhodes family. They let us use their home to have our wedding. I’m pretty sure that’s one of the biggest favors you can do for a person. Like ever. Mama Rhodes- you helped plan, coordinate, cook, light candles, yell at people, set up, clean, joke, hug, and party. I know we’ve already thanked you a lot but seriously, we will owe you forever. Caroline- you freakin’ decorated your front hall like a pro, you figured out the music situation, you drove, you talked, you also yelled with your mother a little bit, you worried so I didn’t have to and you refused to let us do anything in return. You are truly one of the best people in the world and everyone should be jealous of how good you are to me. Eric- you fiddled with cameras and skype so Toby’s brother would get to “be there” for our big day. It’s talent that I don’t have and the wedding would not have been the same without it. I’m sure I speak for several people when I say that gosh darn you are tall now and I appreciate all that you did. Papa Rhodes- you reminded us that we didn’t have to cut the entire cake ourselves (Hero of the hour) and you were super cool about a bunch of weirdos inhabiting your home and having a huge party. You guys all rock and treated us like family. We love you so much!

Ashton- Holy balls, what do I even say? Everyone should have a friend like you. You were my wizard. If I needed ANYTHING you had already thought of it and had it ready. Water, chair, champagne, pizza, cake, tissues, flask of booze, ugh I can’t even remember all of the amazing things to put in this list. PLUS you gave me one of the most beautiful and meaningful gifts ever and getting to see it every day helps remind me of how luck I am. I hope that when you get married that I can come close to being as amazing as you were for me.

Meg- I can’t even. Literally anything I asked you to do you were just like, “Sure I can do that.” Show up and help set things up? Sure. Paint our fingerprint guest book with a theme specific to us? Sure, watch out it will make you cry with how beautiful it is. Take pictures of our wedding and reception with like 2 days notice? Uh-huh, lemme show you how beautiful you people are. You were and continue to be so damn generous with your time and talent and whenever you find someone as equally amazing to marry then you can bet your ass that I am yours to use.

Now to wrap up my shoutouts, please don’t be offended you didn’t get a whole big paragraph, I still love you and appreciate you I just don’t remember all of the amazing things all the amazing people did and I apologize.

Aunt Fanny- You’re amazing and I love you. We don’t get to see each other that often but when we do you make sure it’s a memorable time. Papa Hickey- You brought the booze that made the party and you showed up in a cool hat. You have always supported us and been more than generous and this sentence doesn’t do justice to all that you’ve done for us. Mom- I am so glad you got to be there with me. You helped us with clothes and smiles and I wish that there had been more things for you to do. You were calm and sweet the whole evening and I will always strive to be like you in my everyday life. Samuel- Big brother, you rock. You gave me away to my wonderful husband. We both know that if our dad was still alive that he would have had that job but since you told me that you’d do it when I was 12, I’m really glad that you were able to. Kenny- even though you didn’t get to actually officiate our wedding you still “officiated” it and were awesome. You looked super fresh in your dress blues and I am so glad that we got to have someone we love up there with us on the big day. Xander- The most beautiful gentleman of the evening (groom excluded, sorry) you were our ring bearer and comic relief. You helped keep us sane and gave us the cutest freakin’ aprons in the world. Casey- unfortunately you had to work pretty much right up til the ceremony BUT you came and that’s what matters. It was so good to have you there for the ceremony and reception and the party truly wouldn’t have been as awesome without you.

Uncle Brooke and Aunt Rhonda- our wedding and new life together would not have been possible without you two. I won’t go into specifics here but we literally would not have been able to do what we did without you and we are so grateful to you. We love you so much and are so glad to have people who love us so much in our lives.

This post was going to be more about our life post-wedding but there was just too much to cover about the wedding. We know it was a small ceremony and truly regret not being able to have all of our family and friends over but we know that you still celebrate with us and love us just the same.

Wedding Stuff!

The other day I went to David’s Bridal to make sure the wedding dress I had picked was the one that I actually wanted. I brought along two of my bridesmaids, Ashton and Caroline. Bridesmaid #3 is currently in New York and Matron of Honor was working so we went with what we had! Ashton went with me on my first trip and had pretty much figured out which bridesmaid dress she like best so really only Caroline had choosing to do. Caroline found a dress that suited her extremely well and Ashton, I think, came to a final decision on her future dress. They both looked AMAZING and I really am way more excited now that I can picture what my ladies will look like standing up there with me!

Oh and yes, I made my final decision on my wedding dress. They made me close my eyes and make a wish (still wearing the wedding dress) and then ring a bell. I’m not saying it was super emotional and beautiful but everybody was freaking clapping amd looking at me like a freaking princess so YEAH it was super emotional and beautiful.

Originally the bridesmaids were going to wear black dresses with colored shoes but after some swatch wrangling we decided it would be best to go with black shoes and have the color somewhere else on their person. Also I don’t want my bridesmaids to hate me for having to pay some good money for a pair of shoes they will only wear once. That’s also why I’m going with the black bridesmaids dresses. They are more likely to wear that color again later in life.


Look at me and Caroline look at things! I’m even pointing at stuff!

I’m so happy I got to go with them to pick their dresses and I’m extremely glad that they are willing to be a part of my wedding planning process. Also, they keep me sane with their humor and jokes and whatnot. Now, I promised Ashton I wouldn’t put this picture on Facebook but I said NOTHING about the blog. So Ashton, please still love me after reading this post, you’re amazing and this picture is worth the momentary hate you will feel. Let’s call this a test to see if you read my blog.

We were talking about how trashy this dress was and Ashton demonstrated the benefits of having a dress that only goes to your crotch.

We were talking about how trashy this dress was and Ashton demonstrated the benefits of having a dress that only goes to your crotch.

Also, how about this post has pictures?! I finally decided to share images from my world with you people! Get excited! Whoooo! Now for the whining!

So yeah, the wedding industry is a behemoth that needs to be taken down. While I am perfectly willing to pay what I’m paying for my dress, I wasn’t ok with everything that came with it. First- the alterations department at David’s Bridal could use a lesson in tact. I’m not a tiny person, I am plus size. I’ve struggled with this my whole life and yes, I am attempting to change this. So I have on this dress that makes me feel like a princess and I get the alterations people out there and one asks “So are planning on…Changing….any….” For everyone’s sake I went ahead and cut her off and informed her that I was hoping to lose weight, yes, and wanted to know how it may impact alteration pricing. But lady, it kinda hurt. She was scanning my body while she said it so she wouldn’t have to say “it”. I am learning to love myself every day and I know that the hardest part of loving myself is going to be loving my body. Obviously my body does not stand in the way of others loving me, that’s clear from the amazing Toby and my equally amazing friends and family. David’s Bridal, maybe just give your alterations department a lesson in phrasing. It really makes me sad because finding the dress and getting to work with the sales people was such a positive experience.

Secondly- not only did I start paying for my dress but I got a “vendor bag” at the checkout. Basically it was a bag of pamphlets and flyers for other wedding services and registry stores. There were flyers for gym services and jewelry stores. There was even a flyer that informed me that I could pay someone else to do the name change process for me. BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY there was chocolate. Not just any chocolate but Skinny Cow chocolate. And as it was handed to me the clerk said, “Oh and there’s skinny cow in there, we saved you some calories there.” By the way, this clerk seemed to be more required to say this than to think I needed to know so there’s no ill feeling there. I can dig the chocolate, I ate it and it was delicious. But the stereotype was kinda annoying. I like the idea of giving me chocolate as I shell out serious money for this gown but maybe give the choice of regular chocolate or low calorie. Giving out low calorie chocolate makes it seem like if you’re shopping for a wedding dress you should be watching your weight. And while that’s true for me it may not be true for some smaller brides and may send them the wrong message. Also something something about women and chocolate and happiness something something it makes David’s tricky because chocolate releases positive endorphins and we’re more likely to direct that positivity at the shopping something something it’s just tricky is all.

Third point here – gimme some damn large size shoes. I have sasquatch feet, man feet, tugboats, another popular way to say I GOTS BIG FEET. Yes I want to look like a dainty princess when I walk down the aisle but to do that I need to have appropriately sized shoes. I’m just saying David’s Bridal- step up your game. GET IT?!?! HUMOR!

IN SUMMATION I generally like how things are going with the wedding planning and shopping so far. I would love any ideas on how not to spend money because I refuse to competely give in to the machine that is the wedding industry. I will also accept any delicious finger food/ Hors d’oeuvres recipes/ideas since we are considering doing our own reception food. Please pray for my crazy ass.

The Struggle

I guess I could either make this about like actual, serious struggles that I or other people deal with. OR I COULD MAKE IT ABOUT MINOR THINGS THAT BOTHER ME THAT DON’T MATTER IN THE LONG RUN!!! Judging by how excited I seemed just then I think I’m leaning towards the second one. If you guys promise to keep reading then maybe one day I’ll post about the first one.

So this should be organized right? This one will be limited to non family. Family gets it’s whole seperate thing.

That moment when you make eye contact with a person and you’re unsure of whether or not you should just keep your eyes moving to try and make it look like you were just scanning the area or to give them that awkward “oh you see me seeing you, my bad” half smile.
– When you use public transport and ya got your headphones in, bitch face on, gaze averted, and bag ever so slightly protruding into the seat next to you all in hopes that no one will sit next to you AND THEN SOMEONE DOES. Why? You did all the right things? You were being as unsociable as is polite to be, why don’t they get that? This, by the way, does not apply to a full bus or train car. If it’s getting packed then I suck it up. It’s when there are several empty seats that aren’t near me that I get bothered.
When you’re at the store and you keep passing the same stranger and at first you’re like “ok this is a small enough store for that to happen I guess,” but then after a few more times that turns into “ok um I guess I have a stalker now because I went from looking at tomatoes to looking at paint swatches and here you are still” and as you get in the car you are looking around like a crazy person because you don’t want the police to have to explain to your mother why you’re dead in a parking lot clutching men’s socks and adult diapers with a look of utter fear and insanity permanently on your dead face.
When you’re in the drive-thru and I mean, you’re breaking your diet anyway so why not get a milkshake instead of a drink, right? And when you pull up to the window and they got their judgy face on so you put on your face that says “oh this isn’t for me, as you can see from my overweightness and acne I CLEARLY make good healthy food decisions, my “friend” asked me to get this for her, I’m just a really good friend.” Whatever. They’re probably a whore anyway.
When a stranger asks you a question and you didn’t catch what they said. So then you take a liiiitle too long trying to figure out if you should ask them to repeat themselves or just smile and nod and they tell you to never mind just as you start asking them to repeat themselves so you cut yourself off and turn it into the smile and nod and you look like someone just turned your brain right off. You purse your lips a little bit too so there’s a toadlike element thrown in.

When you walk in and do that smile that says “yes I have appeared to begin my allotted time, let’s not make this any more cumbersome by adding conversation” and they start telling you about why they are considering a very slightly different hair style.
When you’re on your lunch break and someone bothers you with a question. And it’s never something that only you have the answer to. Literally anyone else could answer it. But no, they needed YOU to do it.
When you’re boss walks by just as you’re demonstrating exactly how ridiculous that group of guys at your friend’s wedding looked trying to dance to Gangnam Style. Yeah. That one happened.
You are having such a slow day and then something mildly funny happens and you laugh like you’ve never experienced humor before. And people stare. Because really, it wasn’t THAT funny but your day has been as dry as some clever metaphor that is REALLY DRY so you laugh way harder than is socially acceptable.  Like the laugh that’s just you silently jiggling trying to catch your breath enough to explain exactly why you’re acting like a crazy person.

Yeah for this section I have fewer because I don’t feel comfortable sharing a lot of details about my job due to the confidential nature of many of the things I with work with. So…yeah….

I really love you guys and don’t have any good ones to put here. Just laugh and nod at the screen like I said something funny and clever.

Did I leave anything out? Well yes but that’s because I didn’t want to come off as totally insane.

Wedding FAQ

When you tell people you’re engaged there is immediately a reaction.  It’s usually positive and it’s usually followed by A BUNCH of questions. You may not have ever said more than hello to this person and here they are asking why you would ever choose tulips when roses exist. Spoiler- we aren’t using either. And everyone has an idea about how your wedding should go and they usually find a way to pepper it into the conversation. And if your vision for your wedding isn’t in line with theirs they usually find a way to let you know that as well. You want examples, you say? Well alright.
Oh you’re engaged, Rebekah?  Congrats!  When is the big day?
I don’t mind this question. It’s the most reasonable of the questions. Really, the only negative here is if it’s people that aren’t going to be invited because now they know when it is and if the information on what time of that day and where is leaked then they could invite themselves.
What colors are you guys going with?
Again, not so bad. They may not like those colors but usually they have enough manners to keep that to themselves.
Oh. Rainbow? That’s…..never seen a RAINBOW wedding before.
Yeah well my guess is you’re lame and stupid so shut it. I couldn’t pick like two colors so I went with rainbow. Deal with it.
Oh. Rainbow. I thought Toby was a boy. So you’re a lesbian?
Did I mention these were real life examples? First off- rude.  Second- um ok? Gays don’t have a monopoly on rainbows. Knock that shit off.
So how many bridesmaids are you gonna have?
I mean, I really don’t mind this question but do you actually care or are you just killing time until you can go be awful elsewhere?
Black bridesmaids dresses? That could look like a funeral.
Yup. With the rainbows and wedding dress and smiling people and dancing it’s gonna look like a real service of memorial for the deceased.
I thought you said rainbow. Black isn’t rainbow.
Well I don’t want it to look like a preschool or a carnival so just reign it in and wait to see what I do with it. Jeez.
What’s your wedding budget? 
If I have not ever brought you into my personal finances before then you don’t really get to ask this question. Later on when I brag about how little I spent, THEN this would be a reasonable question.
What kind of food will you have?
It is a year away. Don’t concern yourself with this. I don’t even know the answer.
Who is your maid of honor?
Did you wanna do it? If you are asking this then it’s highly likely that A) you probably are a real detail oriented person and you apply that to EVERY area of life. B) you are simply curious or C) you are a person that would not know who it was if I told you their name and you’re not even gonna be at the damn wedding anyway so why are you asking me all these things?
Are you guys waiting until the wedding night to…..ya know….
Finish the question. Ask me a SUPER personal question that does not concern you even a tiny bit. See how that goes for ya.
Aren’t you a little young to be getting married?
While I understand and appreciate your concern, I don’t think you need to worry about this. This tells me that you don’t think I need to be getting married and I obviously disagree.

Alright I’m done with the examples.  Seriously,  I love talking about my wedding plans, I can’t shut up about them. But if you can’t respectfully inquire about it then please just don’t. By the way, I did not even bring up the questions I get when I tell people I proposed to Toby.  That’s for another post.

If you guys have any questions that I didn’t cover that you don’t think I would mind then ask away!

And Here We Are

When I said I was thinking about starting a blog I was lying. I was gonna start a blog no matter what, I just wanted you to be aware so you’d come read it. Sneaky, tricky, smart, call it what ya like- you’re here and if I was clever enough to get you here I assume I’m clever enough for you to want to keep reading.

I’ve decided to write a blog because depriving the world of my brain is almost a crime. I’m hilarious and you deserve my hilariousness in and around your life. What will I blog about? Shoo son, I dunno. Whatever I feel like blogging about I guess! If you weren’t already aware, I go through phases in my life where I completely engulf myself into one or two things and I have a strong feeling that whatever I’m currently obsessed with will be the topic of this web log.

“Beautiful and witty Rebekah, what is it that currently captures your attention?” Oh you are almost too much. Almost. It’s safe to say my longest lasting obsession is with a boy. I’m adorable, I know. I assume it’s why my wonderful fiance Toby puts up with my shenanigans. Speaking of Toby, I am obsessed with planning our wedding. Super. Obsessed. Like, it’s just over a year away and I already get annoyed with how much I talk about it. If you happen to be one of the people I throw wedding questions at, bless you. I can guarantee that I will talk about our wedding plans in this thing while still maintaining a bit of mystery so you  feel obligated to show up to the real thing. (That’s if you’re invited. Stay tuned to find out what happens if you aren’t) If I don’t provide enough detail here to suit your liking, A) deal with it and B) you can go to my Pinterest page which I will put a link to if I figure out how. I get a little Pin happy so have fun trying to figure out what I’m actually going to use from there.

Oooh you should also follow me on Twitter @DuncanBecks because why not? You’re reading my blog, why not read tiny, blog-like snippets?

Other obsessions-cats, other people’s small children, baking, and the internet in general. Expect all of that on here at some point or another. I cannot promise I won’t go into rants about why wedding themes are stupid or why humans are the worst thing ever to happen while also being amazing creatures that are capable of wondrous things but I’ll try to keep it chill.

I feel like I wanna throw in some fun facts every now and then. I would say every time I make a post but we both know that I won’t be able to keep that promise. I also think I’ll toss in some awesome songs and maybe a humorous video every now and then. All so you can comment and let me know what good taste I have. I mean, I’m already aware of it but it’s nice to be reminded.

Fun Fact Time!

  1. When Toby and I first started dating I told him I would break up with him on the day of our graduation if we lasted that long.
  2. I obviously did not stick to the plan listed in #1.
  3. I think chocolate ice cream is the worst.
  4. Yellow is my favorite color but I never wear it because I’m too self-conscious.
  5. I started this blog partially  in the hopes that Toby would review it because I think he needs to do more writing.

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Was anything I wrote really that concerning? Let me know!